"♥" note to self.

I've decided to omit the word 'love' from this post. Too early to tell what I'm feeling now, so it can be a variable.

He effortlessly completes who I find myself as – who I am. I am learning how to become at peace with myself, and yet I joyously fail. I find myself in you. Where I want to be and where I’d like to be… where I’d ♥ to be. Simply, you answer each inquiry. In the end – you’re magnetic, and I’m not fighting it. Although, I should be. You always say you’re no good for me…

So when ♥ feels like this, is it really how it should be? You comfort me; I’m at ease around you. Sweet and hopeful, and I think of this every time. How can you keep me here? I know that I ♥ you, but are you sure that this is what you call ♥? Stumbling over my own thoughts; I breathe, because if I panic, you’ll run off, heart in hand. Yearning for a mutual compassion and understanding, and someday soon. You remember how it was, right? You know, when I looked into your eyes and blinked at the sight of your soul… or when we held each other, cried, wondered, wished, imagined, dreamt of everything in silence, only broken by the whispers of sweet, meaningful discourse, and my lips as they fell on your skin. Unlike anything else, it was. You hold onto that key, with which you can liberate these perfect memories –revert them into our present day, and aimlessly fall back into the ♥ we once knew. Dive in headfirst. Or reconsider ♥. Redirect ♥. Revise, edit, and re-submit ♥… because sometimes ♥ requires a little proofreading.

So think back, but not too far back. Those days are not destined to return – bittersweet. Hold on, though, ♥. Don’t let the magnet slip away from you. You train yourself to be lost, but we both know where you belong. Haplessly, we couldn’t protect it, but ♥ can be renewed. The only ♥ that I find is worth holding onto is this. Just don’t disappoint it this time around. All the bullshit can never aptly disguise how we feel about this, because at the end of the day the only thing that ever mattered to us was… love.